Kaonashi Ga Suki

Man, I hate going to the dentist.

But this Sunday, I went.

I really didn’t want to, but I knew I had to since I hadn’t gone in like, years.

Yeah, I know, I know. I’m gross. But what can I say? I was out of the country for two of those years (I didn’t trust Japanese dentists), and when I got back, I didn’t have dental insurance so I couldn’t go. Well ok, I had dental insurance for a couple of months, but could never remember to make an appointment. Anywho, I finally managed to drag myself to one.

But seriously though, I hate going to the dentist. Unfortunately, it’s one of those necessary evils in life, right up there with paying taxes, going to work, and having children.

I remember the last time I went to the dentist. I had to get my teeth cleaned, but because it had been a while (as usual), the dentist had to do a nice, deep cleaning, which meant that he had to first novaccaine me up real good. He shot my mouth up so many times that the entire left side of my face went numb. I couldn’t inhale because my nostrils weren’t working. In fact, one of them had actually drooped. I couldn’t smile either since my left cheek had drooped. I looked a lot like Sylvester Stallone. Naturally, I couldn’t drink anything since it just dribbled out my mouth. It was a sad sight.

I remember my dad saying something like, “Ya know, I was planning to take you to the mall after this, but with you looking like that (looks at me and winces)…um, I changed my mind. I’ll just leave you here at home.”

Of course, my mom and sister were even more helpful.

“You look like that old Chinese man from that movie, Big Trouble in Little China!” they cackled.

Fast forward to last Sunday…

My bf and I decided to make a double appointment since he needed to see the dentist too. As it turned out, he had FIVE cavities. That should teach him to brush his teeth at night. He says that his old dentist told him that it takes 24 hours for a cavity to form, so technically it’s ok to brush just once a day. Looks like his old dentist was WRONG.

As for me, I didn’t have any cavities. Miraculous, considering I haven’t had my teeth cleaned in 5 years. However, irony hit me in the face. You see, my back molars are quite sensitive, and it turned out that I had partially worn away some of the enamel (is that the term?) because I had been brushing too hard.

What???

And I thought I was doing a good job in brushing my teeth!

Now I have to get fillings for those worn down areas, switch to a soft-bristled toothbrush, and use Sensodyne toothpaste.

The strange thing about last weekend’s visit was the most pain I felt occured waaay before the actual cleaning, and even before the novaccaine injections. It happened when the dentist applied the gel.

I know, it sounds weird- how could gel hurt? Well you see, the gel is applied to the gums to numb it in preparation for the injection. Normally it doesn’t hurt, but I think that since my upper right molar is very sensitive, the medication from that gel shot up in there and it HURT like a mofo. I was stunned, but didn’t say anything. Of course I felt more pain a little later when he shot up my entire mouth. “You’ll feel just a pinch,” they usually say. Just a pinch, my ass.

The dentist then left me to allow for the medication to kick in and did the same thing for my bf (there was only one dentist). Finally came the cleaning process itself, which is IMO one of the most unnerving, uncomfortable moments. Why is it that the cleaning tool, which looks like one of those hooklike scraper things, make that ear-splitting, nails-on-chalkboard squeaking, drill-like sound? I really can’t stand hearing it. I feel tense throughout the process. He tells me a few times to relax, but it’s tough.

For the most part, I didn’t feel any pain while he cleaned. Usually when I did, I’d feel a tiny bit in the gums. But then when he hit my sensitive teeth, especially the upper right molar, OW. Fortunately at that point, he was nearly finished.

Now my teeth are tartar free and squeaky clean!

But I have to come back this Sunday to put in the fillings.

Boo.