Do you guys get along with your neighbors?
Do you KNOW who your neighbors are?
Every now and then my boyfriend and I would run into a fellow apartment dweller. Quite a few are friendly- they’d say hi and politely smile when we’d pass by them. One time when I was in the laundry room, a neighbor even asked me if we’ve settled down in our new place yet. However there are a few people who don’t seem as friendly. They don’t acknowledge us when we walk by; they just keep walking.
I admit that I myself am not a very social person. I’m really shy and like to keep to myself. I don’t engage in small talk with strangers. It’s just not me. But at least I’d say hello if someone says hello to me.
I’m also not one to knock on someone’s door and welcome him or her to the neighborhood, nor am I one to introduce myself to my neighbors. I didn’t realize that some people did this sort of thing, however. I remember my first weekend in college. I had just moved into my dorm room, and my roommates were out. I then hear a knock on the door, and answered it to find a Chinese girl, a Filipino girl, and a very tall Indian guy standing there. They introduced themselves as my neighbors and welcomed me to the building. They eventually became some of my first friends at UCLA. I thought it was really nice of them to approach me like that, especially since I figured I could never have done the same.
A year can make a world of difference, however, for during my freshman year I made lots of friends and was able to be a little more open and friendly towards people. Sure enough during my sophomore year I found myself with some friends and my boyfriend (at the time he was just my friend), going from room to room in the dorm introducing ourselves to our new neighbors.
Some of my parents’ neighbors are not so friendly. In fact, one couple is downright annoying and nosy. They tend to watch everyone in the neighborhood and report anyone who may not be fully complying to association rules. My parents live in a gated community that’s run by an association. As part of this community, there are certain rules they have to follow. Some are understandable, like curbing your dog. But others are kind of silly in my opinion. For example, one time my dad received a letter from the association warning him to take down his Christmas deer decorations that remained in the front yard or else pay a penalty fee. Yes, it was already late February and they looked ridiculous still sitting out in the lawn, but whose business was it, really? It was my parents’ yard, right? And the deer weren’t obtrusive to anyone. They weren’t in anyone’s way, nor were they lit up at night. Of course the letter didn’t mention how they knew about the deer, but we KNEW it was those idiot neighbors with nothing better to do than to butt in other people’s lives.
So what are your neighbors like? Do you get along with them?
13 Responses to “Neighbors”
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A few years ago, I lived in an apartment building with thin walls. My neighbor next door used to have crazy sex. Like, throw each other around the room and topple things over kind of sex. Making animal noises kind of sex. This would go on for about half an hour. Then came the loud AC/DC music. This would always go down around 4 a.m.
oh well, my current neighbors are super nosy too. sometimes when i was sitting in the garden sunning myself, i saw the neighbor peeking from her own garden. guess what?? then i waved at her and said hi, she didn’t say a word but went away, as if i couldn’t see her or something. i call her my “ghost neighbor”, coz i could see her but could never interact with her.
i used to be the one knocking at my new neighbors’ doors when i was living in my dorm. but hey, this only work if your neighbors are welcoming. i got some very cold faces and unwelcoming gestures, to be honest. but well, i did my job already. if you wanna be a loner, go ahead!!
and now i’m looking for an apartment and would hopefully be moving again within a month or two. what i’m planning to do is to hold a little “getta-know-each-other” kind of party a month after we have moved in. crack open a coupla bottles of red wine / beer, munch on some cheese and sausages…if it doesn’t work, the neighbors don’t worth it no more anyway.
but well, best of luck with you mingling with your new neighbors. give it some time!!
i moved into my apartment two months before i realized who my neighbour was and there are only 50 units in my building. most of the time, it almost feels like i wander around alone, never running into anyone other tenants… but it’s not like i hang out around the building.
otherwise, it’s sensible to acknowledge and catch a glimpse of other people who live there - if you recognize them, you might hold the door and not just slip in, afraid they are not tenants trying to get into the building for nefarious reasons.
that whole knocking on your neighbours’ door seems so cool but so doesn’t happen. i would have loved if someone would or if it wasn’t strange if i could go and do it. so the least i can do to break the ice is to smile at people who appear to really live in the building.
Johnnie- ah, noisy sex neighbors. When my bf and I lived in Japan, there was this couple next door who constantly fought, and we could hear them through the walls. Every now and then however, we’d hear a different sort of sound coming from them. The girl would be squeaking and moaning and such. It wasn’t loud and crazy, but loud enough!
Anna- strange that your neighbor was watching you sun yourself. Was she an old batty lady, perchance?
Wyn- I think the notion of introducing yourself to your neighbor is probably more common in college dorms since their living quarters are much smaller (they’re just rooms, after all), not to mention that people are less serious and uptight in college and just want to make friends.
hi..I usually make it a habit to get to know my neighbors … you never know when you may need something…
but for the past three years, I have been living on campus, and yes I know every one of my neighbors…on all the floors. There are a few here though that are very secluded and figure that they spend enough time with others in class, and so when they get in their rooms or apartments, you don’t see them until class again…
anyway….nice post…
so after reading this post, i thought i’d try to be friendlier to any neighbors i saw while walking my dog. i thought i was being more friendly by saying ‘hi’ to people. most of these people i’ve seen before (i always take my dog on the same path). the response was really 50/50. i even had one guy stare me down. how rude!
Now that I own a house, I’m much friendlier with my neighbours than I ever was when I lived in an apartment. Maybe it’s because living in a house is more permanent, but except for one creepy old couple across the street, I at least know a little bit about all my neighbours.
We live in a cul de sac and one of our annual events is setting up a bunch of tables in the middle of the street on Halloween and pass out candy together. It keeps the kids from having to go from house to house to house and gives us a chance to socialise.
Also as a homeowner, I do a lot more handiwork around the house (no superintendent to call) so I find myself visiting a couple of my neighbours a lot to borrow tools or pick their brains for know-how.
I’m friends with my neighbor. Granted, I only have one. He is a cool guy and he got me into blogging. He is kinda a computer nerd, but, there is nothing wrong with that. We occasionally smoke a bowl together, so I guess that makes us good neighbors! The other side of my street is the cemetary. They are by far the best neighbors I have ever had.
I do know my neighbor - he is a nice but quiet guy
I avoid my neighbors because I’m afraid they’ll bitch at me about my weeds. It’s been 5 years and I’ve said hello about 3 times.
You have to get along with your neighbors. You have to know them. Not doing so seems rude to me. You don’t have to like them but you need to know them.
I finally managed to update the link from blogspot . . . sorry, no one told me!
Keep working. It’s looking better. (What gives me the right to come off so bossy?)
I live in a small buidling with thirty-five units. I know the name of every person who owns an apartment in this building. I will invite many of them over for coffee, or drinks, and in return I have been invited to many of their parties, barbeques, and other social get togethers.
So yes, I know and like my neighbours. Very much.
Andrena- I agree, you never know when those neighbors might come in handy.
Jen- that dude who stared you down has issues. Weird.
Dave- Why does it seem that every neighborhood has one creepy old couple (or at least, a creepy old person) in it?
Ronald- a cemetery! Now THOSE are some creepy neighbors!
Dawn- nice and quiet is a good combo
Bug- at least you don’t live in an area where they can report your weeds to some association.
Warchild- I’m confused…you didn’t realize this was a different link?
Michele- Oh, I have no problem believing that you know all the people in your building
It’s in your nature to be social. Do you do a “Michele sent me” to someone new who moves in? 